Abbey in the Philippines: Sister Abbey Hafen // Week Sixty-Five // "September" // "This Is How My Week Really Was"

This week was another great one. It was really really hot again but also there was a typhoon we had to lockdown for. My spirits were a little low this week but of course Heavenly Father wouldn't have that! He gave us lots of miracles and brought us right back up.

Our awesome investigator Jonathan came to church for the first time yesterday! It was so cool. He just decided to be absent from his work because he really wanted to come to church. Jonathan is our investigator who attends the Addiction Recovery class each week (which he also told his boss he had to be to) and was an investigator in 2010 but couldn't kick his cigarette addiction so wasn't baptized before. He was then referred to us again by our member Bryan, and now is so progressing and is overcoming his addiction. It has been so cool. I love him so much and love seeing him progress in the gospel.

I’m still doing so good. Still healthy, still eating lots of rice, still riding in tricees and jeeps every day, still loving my companion, still obsessed with this culture, still having a pretty hard time speaking English, and still really loving this work; although redundant at times and so tiring, it still in the best work I’ve ever been a part of.

Much love…

Sister Hafen!

Hahahaa, after I sent that email, I read it and wanted to barf. I hate not being honest and that last email was just a big load of crap hahah. I am laughing as I read it again and just want to apologize :) Good thing as my family you all love me and trust me and won't laugh at me for sending a "correction" or "part 2 " of what i sent :)

I love this work but this week was a hard one. I am so focused during the day, and when I get discouraged I just pray and heavenly father really strengthens me. The work drives me and splits with the sisters really help me stay focused and do my best to be the best I can be. But this week, its been so hard for me to sleep at night. My mind just wanders and I have noticed my lack of self control of my thoughts as I lay in bed. I have noticed times as well when I think “how many times have I street contacted, how many times have I shared the message of the restoration, how many times have we tracted this street with no success, how many times have we visited this less active and she still hasn’t come to church, etc. It has been a feeling that I actually really hate, but seems to keep coming back. I know what I need to do to get rid of it- just keep going.

How many times has Heavenly Father probably wanted to think all that about me? “How many times have I helped sister hafen and she still thinks that way, how many times….” I am doing my best to really be “A Successful Missionary” and work on my weaknesses. We took a survey as a mission that is like the survey in PMG in becoming christlike (the end of chapter 6). My strengths were, as I guessed, under DUTY. I am very capable of fulfilling my duty- doing things I know are expected of me. But when it comes down to it, sometimes I really only do it because of that, because it IS my duty. The scriptures of moroni telling us that if you’re just doing it without real charity, it’s not worth anything, and in 1^st Corinthians 13 as well, that its worthless if its not done with your whole heart.

Those verses sometimes scare me, but as I write this and reflect on myself as a missionary, I feel like maybe one way I show my love for my father in Heaven and Savior, is by my strict diligence to them, even when I feel my heart losing it, my mind still pushes me forward, because I really do love them.

I love my Savior and I am grateful to be His missionary. I really will do my very best this week to control my thoughts and make the desire of my heart match my actions. I am so happy he allowed me to serve him Full time and I can't believe that there's just 2 more transfers after this. I love being a missionary more than I thought i really could.

A much more honest and true,

Sister Hafen ;)